Welcome to the SR family!
You will find lots of support and information here. Please make yourself at home by reading and posting as much as needed.
I understand the "stinking thinking", and I had to retrain my brain. I carried around a piece of paper in my wallet that reminded me of what I was walking away from. It said:
______'s love comes with:
drunkeness
physical illness
legal problems
financial woes
emotional stress
depression
It may also help to journal. Writing down all the things I have endured from my front row seat to the addiction, and re-reading them later helped me to maintain my resolve. My resolve to take better care of me.