I agree w/pretty much everyone. The part that concerns me most is if you are going to try to stop them from pressing charges because you think his recovery will collapse...in fact, it may solidify his recovery knowing that all consequences will be answered by him alone. I don't think anything we can do can make them "fall off" the wagon if they truly want recovery..only they can decide that. My AD has done some real crappy stuff to our family too. She is going to have to answer for all of them herself. That will be at the discretion of her and her sponsor.Does your son have a sponsor..sounds more like their area of expertise. Maybe call your sponsor about the embarrassment and guilt w/ the family. Gotta keep those recoveries seperate....