I really do know how you feel. It's embarrassing even when we know we aren't the ones who stole. I think it's a good thing that your AS is confessing to what he did, and I hope he finds a way to make amends without getting charged with a crime. I know we are suppose to let them feel the consequences, but I also know it is hard to do that when we are watching them do the work to get well. I find it's a lot easier to be hard on my AS when he is actively using...once he gets a little clean time under him and acts like a civilized human being for a while, I soften a little. Trying to quit doing that so much as I have been kicked in the gut by him with relapses so often.
Praying that your AS feels the consequence of letting down those who love him enough that he is determined not to ever put him or your family in this position again.