cherrie,
I am also sorry for what has brought you here, but agree with others, it is not your fault nor can you "fix" things for him.
My son (29 yrs old) borrowed money from my parents to purchase a car, many years ago. I was with him the night he asked them to borrow the money, so feel some sense of responsibility - like I was vouching for him or something. Anyway . . . you know the out come . . . money has never, NEVER been paid back. For a while I made payments to my parents for that money, but after a while they said "stop", we know the money is coming from you and it is not your debt to repay. I feel bad, but there is nothing I can do to "make" my son own up to his responsibility. I pray in time he will repay the debt - in the meantime, my father has passed away and I know my son lives with regret - my son tucked a note into my Dad's suit pocket in the coffin.
My son also has a warrant out for his arrest for "theft by swindle", he tried to sell my car without my knowledge - took money from a man, but then couldn't turn over ownership because the car was not in his name. I reported the incident to the police, if I hadn't the man who paid him money would have been able to sue me as an accomplice.
So yes, I've been where you are - my son will eventually have to pay for the mistakes he has made, I can't do that for him. I am "paying" for the mistakes I've made trying to run his life, take care of him, rescue him, etc. I've learned not to do that anymore.