Yes the 20th, but not sure of which month.
He is still here. Paid half the rent. Has said often he really enjoys living with me. Still not moving a finger to clean the house. Today I have been up for 28 hours already and just couldn't stand all his morning noises......... I asked if he was really moving, because so far I see no indication.
He said "my friend lost his job" and it was the end of the string - how is that MY issue? I got really angry and told him he has until the 12th to leave, the last day he has paid. Meanwhile I am ordering my books and drawing area...
He asks why I am "so selfish" and "not nice" and that he loves me- when I am in a good mood. I told him his macho idea of a perfect but inferior woman is unfit for a relationship with me or any modern woman. He said I am hostile. I said I can't live to keep him happy. I am human and have my bad days, weeks and months and am looking forward to peace and my stuff and giving up the Tc999 I was - I thought I changed after XABF but no, THIS is really my bottom, my "I can't send so much energy down the drain anymore. It is mine. I need it. I enjoy it. I can't go without it any longer".
So finally he said that YES he will look for something else and that he is not happy either. Oh oh, he also said if he stayed, HE could save enough money to go to the beach wedding with me. I said "yes that is convenient for YOU but not me".
I believe my anger grows as my therapist mentions and show examples of what others are living in terms of healthy relations and men that are really the breadwinners and what the woman earns is for her enjoyment and extra stuff.
Meanwhile he doesn't take the trash out, throws his socks everywhere -CAN'T put them in the box for dirty clothes- still asks to use my computer and says we are improving together and that one day he will be rich and invite me to a beach and it will be all on him.
Too bad for him I no longer thrive in imaginary events. I just see the socks, the fact we have no spoons or food and he will live by Mcdonalds and KFC, HASN'T BOUGHT A DAMN SOAP FOR HIMSELF ALL THIS TIME! the snoring, the dirty dishes sitting while I bill 53 working hours and pick up stuff and do yoga.
He plays while I do the hard work.. NO MORE... I have been so dumb... incredible.
No more picking his stuff. My therapist is so right he wants a mom not a partner and I fill that role. Filled. At least I am seeing my pattern now and not thinking he is this or that, I see my 50%.
I got therapy homework that is about writing down a letter to my mom and my dad asking for all the things I needed and were not given. I forecast good tears and healing. I want to forgive everyone and stop carrying the past. I wish to enjoy my day with a pure heart.
PS I am looking for other places without him knowing.