My favorite relaxing "me time" was crawling in bed and watching a tv show. That was after my son went to bed of course, which varied. Laying down and feeling the pressure off my feet and mind drift away felt wonderful.
I think when we drink we look at the alcohol as relaxing because it forces our body to relax but our actions cannot really follow. We still have to cook and interact with the family.
I still ask my husband to take over once in awhile when he gets home after work so I can have some quiet time. I relax, without the booze, and then I can perform better as a parent later on.
I am sorry you are having a tough time but you are doing really well and you have a great attitude. Keep talking to your husband and don't worry your emotions will level out.
SH