Originally Posted by
kia 
this is me now thank u so much now i know im not going mad question is what to do cos i have withdrawn from sex to protect myself but dont know what to do next but ive taken all that in and will think about what it all means
Next you'll likely have to leave him, as much as you don't want to hear that.....for the sake of your sanity.
Once I realised my sanity was at risk, and my own health, believe me, my love for my ex pretty much vanished.
The longer you stay in a situation like this, the worse your anxiety and depression will become.