Beaumawe, A drunk, cracked-out man is DANGEROUS and TOXIC.
That is very true, we have never had a physical altercation, but lately, when he goes off on a rampage of yelling I look in his eyes & I truely don't know this person. He looks crazy. A very dear friend sent me an email with traits of a sociopath, and the scary thing is he fit every single thing to a T, down to killing small animals as a child. Maybe sociopaths & alcoholics walk a very similar path. He has changed so incredibly much from the person I met 8 years ago.
When he is on one of his binges, I hardly sleep. I will be honest & admit I have a baseball bat & fishing knife next to my bed. I try to tell myself that I am being paranoid, but I can tell when he gets that crazy look that he is no longer there.
Writing on these posts helps, to re-read what I just wrote makes me wonder what in gods name I am doing with this person in my life.