Harry, I think I kept drinking for a very long time because the idea of living without alcohol terrified the bejeebies out of me. What if I went to treatment or AA or something and it actually worked????? The error in my thinking was that I thought drinking too much was my problem. In fact, alcohol was simply the means by which I attempted to resolve me problems...my social ineptitude, my self-loathing, my shame, etc. But I didn't get that...not at first, anyway. I became a convert when I learned about AA's 12 steps & realized they offered a design for living sober. Only the first step addresses drinking, and I believe it is the only one that must be worked to perfection: I had to surrender, to admit down to the tips of my toes that alcohol had beaten me. I couldn't do it any longer. It does not happen too quickly, but there certainly is life without alcohol. And there would not have been with it.