his Excordis and
to SR. I'm glad you found us.
Let me first post the 3 C's of addiction for you:
You didn't CAUSE it.
You can't CURE it.
You can't CONTROL it.
This "mantra" really helped focus me when I was trying to understand my XAH (ex alcoholic husband)'s alcoholism. I too was VERY patient. I too thought that with time, my love, and patience, he'd somehow "see the light" and realize that he NEEDED to stop drinking.
It never happened.
You're way smarter and more honest than I ever was with myself when I decided, against everyone's advice to MARRY the alcoholic and drug user I was dating. You've only been with him 10 months and you can already see how unfair and toxic he is to you.
I know how hard breaking up is, especially when you're the one doing the breaking. In the end though, 10 months of your entire life is nothing...a drop in the proverbial bucket. If you care for your boyfriend, step back and give him the space he needs to find recovery on his own. He may NEVER find it, but at least you'll have protected yourself.
As one of our super wise SR members said today, "Self-love is not selfish".
Choose yourself, because if you don't, neither will he. The booze will always come first.
Keep posting and reading. SR is always open
