I like what I have read regarding the term HFA in the previous posts, and I don't mind the term because it probably feeds my ego. I looked at the way I drank as a macho badge of honor type of thing. I prided myself on the fact that I could drink more than anyone in the room and accomplish more than them as well. I thought it was fun to outcoach other coaches and out sell my sales counterparts and be drunk doing it. I liked to drink hard until 2AM with my buddies, then get up at 6AM and pop a six pack on the golf course and see my buddies still puking from the night before and then beat them in golf. My drinking was a very competitive aspect of my life, and I felt it showed what a tough, cool, guy I was.
I realize now that although I was functioning, I was also a very immature idiot! I still acted like I was 17 and it took some mental maturing on my part to realize that I was killing myself and that I truly had a problem.