That sounds very hopeful, Posie.
Everyone's experience is her own, so it isn't that surprising that the kids perceive some things differently. We all have our own filters through which we look at the world.
Even where there is no abuse or addiction or serious problem in a family, kids get angry, feel put upon, resentful, etc. The important thing is that they now have a couple of good resources--AlaTeen and you--to help them sort out their feelings and make some kind of sense out of them. Reality checks they can use.