posiesperson

...and they liked it! My 14 yo DD said that she "talked about Dad." My 12 yo DD said she realized that there are some things that the two of them disagree on with regard to Dad. Interesting. I didn't ask for details, and they didn't share them at that time. There will be opportunities to get back to that but there was a lot happening as they were stating all of that. Tomorrow, when my 12 yo and I have some time together, we can discuss it if she wants to.

Tomorrow night is another meeting and my 14 yo is all fired up about it! The 12 yo not so much, but we'll see.

Thanks for all of your replies to my parenting thread a few days ago. I feel like I'm doing my best by giving them a place to talk if they want to--both with me and with a supportive group.

I have a long way to go in terms of finding serenity in dealing with their Dad. Today the kids told me even more information about how he subtly blames them for things that happen in HIS life, that HE has control over. I want to scream and throttle him. It's so insidious that it's easy to miss, but my 14 yo is catching on, a result of all of her pain in her relationship with him.

Send me warm thoughts, please, and continued ESH! I think my task right now is to make extra-sure that I'm not allowing any feelings I have toward their Dad's manipulation seep into my interactions with the kids. I know I need to let them learn the painful lessons about him that they need to learn, that they will be stronger for it. But damn it, it's not easy.

Hugs,
posie