Kitty,
You are so much like me. I anticipate and worry and fret and project the worst. I got that from my parents. It's a hard habit to break. But, it really does me no good, and in fact I know that it makes things even worse, because it saps my energies . . . which are needed elsewhere.
Someone suggested that if I must worry, then set aside a time slot each day to worry. And allow myself that luxury for only that specified time slot. I tried that a couple of times, and it worked once. <GRIN> But, otherwise, it just opened the floodgate and I couldn't control it once I started down that slippery slope.
So, I move. Movement is my friend. When I catch myself in a worry state, I do something active . . . even if it's going for a brisk walk (even in the rain). I find that is the best therapy for me for depression too.
Anyway, I feel your frustration and your anxiousness. Know that I send you my hugs and my prayers.
Jon