Originally Posted by
ChrrisT 
But what about the one's we don't hear about? They or their family members don't go to meeting or reach for help other places.
Maybe they are not angry life destroying alcoholics, maybe they function well in society and manage their alcoholism. Maybe they stay alone and don't involve anyone else. Maybe their families are too selfish care.
I'm not sure but I might be able to offer some insight into this group. My mother got ill when I was about 5 years old. She went to doctor after doctor and no one could tell her what was wrong with her (I think this is when she started self-medicating with alcohol). After three years or so, she found a doctor who diagnosed her with RA (Rheumatoid Arthritis). She started getting medicine for it, but if you aren't aware there is no cure for this disease, and it is a slow, painfully debilitating disease. So she added to her medicine with drinks. I'm not sure when it became all out alcoholism, maybe when I was 13-14. She never had therapy to deal with her disease, and we did not as a family have therapy to deal with my sisters seizure disorder which also was a factor.
One of the reasons we never (despite my asking for it) sought help was because that was just not done in our family. So my father and I enabled, and my sister left home as early as she could. It had nothing to do with the family not caring, and it wasn't that the disease did not effect the family it did. Getting help for emotional problems was just not accepted.
I spent my whole entire life putting everyone's needs before my own, and self-medicating my misery with alcohol. It took me 20 years to actually realize this and several more to get enough of my ducks in a row to get sober. I had to establish boundaries with all my family members before I could even attempt to get sober and feel I could speak on a place like SR.
My mother can function fairly well, because my father takes care of her. She has good days and bad days, she also has major problems with pain killers at this time. She would kill me if she knew I was posting this, anonymous or not.
So I hope that sheds a little light on that subject.
Sorry about hijacking the thread. I believe in God and have since as far back as I can remember despite growing up in an Atheist/Agnostic home...go figure.