Yes I know my kids absolutely come first, and I feel bad that I have let them go through what they have. I know I should have put my foot down and left at his first drunken blow up but I am (what is at times a curse) a person who always see's the light in people. I am always a very optimistic and hopeful person and I thought that my love and support and guidance and him having the best reasons in the world to quit, (his kids and I) I could help him..I of course realize after many years that this is not the case. Yes only 3 more weeks till my new place is move in ready and as I am hurting to see him hurt and I wanna just hold him and tell him everything is ok, I am so ready to move in and get away from him. I love him but he brings me down alot specially when I cannot a do a single THING to help him!!
I know I am doing the right thing...My grandmother always told me "the hardest choices in life are usually the right ones"
I know what she is speaking of now.
I have my first Alanon meeting tonight..so nervous but I'm ready.