Hi Smacked!!
I love your post but...
Like the OP mentioned she couldn't believe how selfish those alcoholics seem in their posts..we alcoholics wonder why codies are so meddling, and willing to give their lives up to "us".
Why is it that people who fall in love or love alcoholics are called "Codies"?
I love a man who is sweet, sexy, hard working, kind, smart, loves his family and who is an Alcoholic.
His addiction masked those qualities a lot of time. But they were still there, buried under pain and resentment from experiences I had nothing to do with. That being said I did have my breaking point, where I gave up and ended it.
Cold turkey! No contact - Done
As soon as we realize we're fighting the same battle, and not from different sides, true healing can be done, I believe. There will be alcoholics who drink themselves to the grave, and lots of codies following right behind wondering how they can fix it..there will be alcoholics who embrace recovery and live the rest of their beautiful lives with their healthy indepenent loved ones.
(thank you for saying the above)
My RAH knows I could have lived the rest of my life just fine without him and he knows that I stayed with him during those hellish times because I loved him.
He appreciates and cherishes that now, because through is recovery he has learned it is a blessing to FEEL truly loved.