Well I finally did it...
This morning (Friday) I woke him up to tell him he better decide soon where he's going to go and what he wants to do from here because clearly, he cannot stay here. As expected he begged and pleaded to stay a "few extra days". I was very tempted to let him stay at least the weekend but I felt I had to put my foot down. I remembered what others have said here, if I let him get too comfortable he'll only make himself and I worse. After some off anf on argueing it was settled he was to go into a homeless shelter downtown. I hated driving there. I never thought in a million years that I'd be driving him to such a place. No more then a year ago was he working a professional job and was a very clean cut and successful man. Looking at him now, I see nothing more then a alcoholic, drug addicted man who's only an empty shell of his former self. The place itself was almost eerie - I've been fortunite enough to never have to deal with these kinds of places. I also saw people who were actually much worse then him. They looked as though they've been using for decades. I wondered to myself, will my "husband" turn out like this? Is this his future? I quickly told him good bye before I changed my mind. I gave him some money to help him out a bit and that was it... Not sure where he's going to go from here. He did say he'd keep in touch
We did have one wonderful moment together. Every day I go to visit my daughters grave and before he would never go with me. Until yesterday, he's never gone with me to remember her and to be with her. It was the perfect moment. The weather was unusally pleasent for this time of year and everything around us seemed calm. He even bought flowers to place beside her which was something unexpected from me.