Not a newcomer to recovery but might as well be
Well Im going to give it another go. Basically I was drinking and gradually losing control of it so I bought a stack of beer yesterday and vodka and drank until I fell asleep. When I woke up this morning I felt awful and went straight to the sink and poured the final 6pack away.
It seems that unless I totally sicken myself this way with booze, I am unlikely to stop as I trick myself into thinking I can control it as I never feel too bad the next day. But deep down I know I must stop and am glad I did what I did this morning.
So a new day one and as depressed and anxious as my condition is, at least I am going to stop for good now.