Jaffa, I am sorry you are going through this right now. I am proud of you for staying sober and here is my advice - Screw the neighbors and that whole lot. You are sober for you and you first. Personally, I wouldn't go and I wouldn't care what they thought. You got off the sauce for a reason and that is a heck of a lot more important then what some boozing pals think.
As far as the spouse goes...well we can only wish our partners the best but he will get sober for himself when he is ready. As much as we are supportive and caring, we must know that while others can't fix us.....well we can't fix others.
Hang in there friend. This is one of those challenges that come at us in early sobriety but know that drinking will only make things worse.
I had to cut off people in my life when I got sober and started recovery because they just didn't understand me nor cared. They knew I had alcohol problems and criticized me for drinking but were quick to always invite me to some booze event. Think it made them feel good about their own drinking if I was there. This way everyone can point to me and say....wow man....now she REALLY has a problem. Bluh
Keep posting and definitely take it one day at a time. Focus on you....not others. Guarantee most of them wouldn't be there when you really need them. Not when we hit rock bottom.