I'm a newcommer here, and to dealing with alcoholism. I've been trying to quit for 6 months and have made it as far as 37 days. His relaps was almost exactly like mine. I was clean for the longest time since I started drinking, but then I took some hydrocodine to help cope with the back surgury I got a month before. I spent the next day and a half poping pill after pill, and then hit the bottle. I later threw the rest away and got off the alcohol. I've relapsed since and am only on day 8 of being sober.
I don't have his history, and it's probably not a good idea for me to be in a relationship, or even to give advise on one. But I kind of live by the "3 strikes and your out" rule. From what I read (correct me if I'm wrong), all he did so far was feed his addiction in the past, cleen for 13 years (supposingly), then he relapsed for one day on pain killers.
I think its good of you to check out opinions here, and also listen to some of your friends, then reflect on it all. If he was new to recovery like me, I would tell you to "get the hell out of dodge". But he's definitely not me, nor do you really know what his recovery is really like.
I guess what I'm trying to say is just stand back and look at the whole picture. If this was happening to a good friend of yours what whould you advise her to do?
Good luck
Dune