Hugs, Still Waters.
You might want to do a bit of research into the laws for your state. Abandonment (desertion) may be defined in any number of ways, in some states, its "wilfully leaving the marriage
without just cause and without the consent of the other spouse." Excessive use of alcohol or drugs may be just cause. In Alaska, there is a Family Law Self-Help Center that can help with forms and there are lawyers who offer "unbundled" services, which is basically a set rate to assist with a particular aspect of a case (though I think it's for if you're filing on your own). Maybe something similar is available in your area?
I wouldn't take his attorney's word for anything. He's paid to say what your STBX wants to say in a manner that is understood by the courts. Just because he says it, doesn't make it true.
I'm sorry that I really don't have much other advice to offer. I'm just starting my divorce and STBXAH was just served his paperwork. I don't know what to expect from him but his text message from when he received the paperwork is not encouraging (in fact it had me scared, shaking and feeling sick and cornered).
I completely understand being tired of it all.
Hang in there.
