Sucks that you succumbed to the holiday drinking urge. Luckily I was at work all day, but I'm sure I wouldn't have had a drink if I'd been off work. I believe that it was a miracle that caused me to stop drinking, and in my view of things miracles come from my God. So I'll be damned if I'm causing his miracle to be wasted by me going out and drinking again.
But even without that view of things, any objective person would clearly say that my drinking behavior was insane. The things I did to hide drinking, the way I tried to rationalize my actions, always on the lookout for cops, telling lies to people I cared about, passing out on the couch with my clothes on while a beautiful woman was in my bed, the insanity of thinking if I continue to do the same things (drinking and trying to control it) that somehow things would turn out differently...Sane people don't do the things I did when I was drinking. So if I decide to go out and drink again, I'm effectively giving away my sanity. I know the insane behavior that will follow, so by choosing to drink, I'm making the conscious decision to begin living like an insane person again. Because as soon as I take that first drink, my insanity will start as I try to control my drinking, try to wait a while between sips, try to rationalize having only 1 shot with just a couple beers. No thanks.
So you're going to try some moderation. Good luck with all that. We'll all be here. At least I don't intend to go anywhere.