baabaa

My partner of 16 years is at his worst. He was an addict when I met him but didn't realize it(I was only a teenager). We have three children and I have never touched drugs and very rarely drink. He has been on heroin for three years now and over the last three months has been on methadone, he is still using heroin and has moved from smoking to injecting it, he is also drinking very heavily for the last two weeks. I am in hell. I have been going to Al Anon for support but I work full time and am extremely run down and stressed. I have no life and all our money is spent on drugs and drink now. He hasn't worked in years. Tonight I caught him trying to inject and when I confronted him he squirted the water from the needle into my face, laughing he said "Your face, its only a joke" I had to make sure sure he didnt overdose and have been watching him for the last two hours. He is asleep with the needle in his hand and empty cans all around him. I know I am not in love with him anymore but feel responsable for him. His family are not very helpful and have stood back from the situation. I am so alone and no one knows about us, as I never told anyone. I cant cope and dont want to be in this situation anymore. I know I cant do it for him and have given up on the empty promises. He has stolen money from me, taken money from the kids, he has been extremely voilent and I have had orders taken out in the past, although he never spent time in prison as I have never had the heart to prosecute him maybe because of fear and repercussions. My eldest child asked if his daddy was on drugs today as they had learned about in school. I denied it as i am not ready to tell him. He is only 13. I am desperately isolated,lonely and I need this to end. I cant take this anymore.