Originally Posted by
Hurtingbad 
I do have a bit of a personality problem. When I can't figure something out, I study it and learn about it until I find a solution. that's why i've been so successful in my career. I have never found a problem I couldn't figure out. This is just so foreign to me. I feel so angry, so cheated.
That's the exact kind of thinking that had me stuck for years, too many too painful years.
I'm afraid you're approaching this problem from a wrong angle, or even more you're focusing on a wrong problem. the one that is out of your power to solve. But if you change your focus from him to you, and open up to discover even things you might not be ready to learn about yourself, than there is a problem you can solve. As right now you're trying to get something you can't have, you want reality under your terms, not for what it really is. I'm not judging you, far from it, I'm just trying to offer alternative perspective. IMO being smart is not as much about solving things that come our way, but more about finding alternatives to things we're unable to solve.
I found the more I was willing to challange myself to alternatives of my thinking, beliefs and paradigms on life, the more I was likely to move in the right direction.
I wish you well