FreeingMyself

I was reading some responses to a post I made the other day...where some mentioned that what everyone was saying was falling on deaf ears. Very true in a way....because I have made no signifigant changes regarding my relationship with my AH. However, today while I was out exercising and talking to my HP I had a realization. I am no longer going to post about what AH is or isn't doing....because quite frankly it just doesn't matter. I am going to stop feeling like he is doing "this" to me, and start focusing on myself and who I am. In this entire situation I lost that person...and "she" is who I am going to find, not worry about him. So today I decided that I would start my own personal journal only about me...what I think, what I feel....I decided that I needed to accept how I feel about the situation and that what I feel is ok. I guess I just felt an extreme awareness of how much I have been focusing on him and not on myself or my children. I know I have heard people say this to me many times over the last year....somehow it just sunk in after the posts yesterday and my run this morning! SO.....here is to starting a new focus on me and my recovery!