Hi Ronan. I relate to that post quite a bit. I think it's probably quite a typical of a young alcoholics experince in UK/Ireland where binge-drinking is the social norm.
My drinking became obviously alcoholic and I felt like an alcoholic. Also my drug use was pretty heavy during my binges too, so as well as not being able to not take more drinks, then I would always end up buying drugs too. Totally powerless. When I was in the buzz then I wasn't stopping as I loved it too much. It was f*cking great. Even if it wasn't then my alkie mind would tell me that it was. That is why it is so hard to give up. You have to smash yourself down untill you can view yourself as different to most people through pure hard-earned painful experince. Then you gotta accept it 100% and act on it and embrace recovery.
It is very hard as a young person in UK who is alcoholic as it's a grey area in a culture of binge-drinking wreckheads. Drugs like Cocaine, cannabis and well, pretty much them all are so widely used. So it's crucial that you admit and accept that you're an alcoholic or an addict. otherwise then you're certain to take that first drink, spliff or line eventually. May not be the case in other countries but in the UK there is a real culture of drink and drug bingeing and just have big sessions.
For me without knowing and accepting that I'm an alcoholic then I wouldn't stand a chance. That first drink would be taken eventually through total resentment and then I would be off again drinking and drugging. Losing everything.
peace