Support from boyfriend?
Hey all, everything came to light about 4 days ago and I have not used since then. I was addicted to painkillers....any and all i could get my hands on. Theeree were a few times i got away from them, not really by choice but because i ran out and couldn't find more. Most recently I have been dealing with an addiction to morphine. My dad found out and called me out on it, fortunately he was very supportive and didn't make me feel bad, he just wants to see me get into an outpatient program and start going to meetings. I have a friend who works for a recovery program and she has been very helpful as well. Luckily, so has my mother. It was literally a divine intervention, as the VERY DAY i was caught, an acquaintance toted me to let me know he finally found a hook up for oxys. I thank the good lord that this came out and i told him no, i dint want any. I don't want ti go down that road again, but that is another story for another time,
My issue is my boyfriend. When this all came to light, i called him and told him that my dad caught me and that i am done with this, i have struggled with it since i was 17 ( I am 30 now) and that i am going to seek help and start going to meetings. He had said in the past he was concerned about my addiction, but never tried to stop me or anything, He is currently using prescribed drugs to deal with his own pain. Anyway when i told him this, i asked
1. That he would not joke or make "cute" comments to me about it, as in "awww my little morphine addict" etc. Its not funny to me, i am serious about staying clean and i don't think its something to joke about or bring uo casually.
2. That we could talk about it if i brought it up, but i did not want to talk about it otherwise with him. I want to leave it in the past. There is nothing i did not already tell him about my problem. If i want advice i will talk to my friend who irks at the treatment program, or my sponsor when i get one.
3. That he not tell anybody about it, bc word travels fast and i am embarrassed about this.
So i went to his house last night and within 5 minutes he made a joke, insisted that he can bring it up to talk about it if he wants to bc he is so "concerned" about me. He thinks that making me talk about it when i don't want to is supporting me. I told him the best way to support me would be to support the positive things i am doing right and not remind me of the things i did wrong in the past. Then he tells me he asked a coworker for advice bc she had dealt with her ex husbands pill addiction. Obviously this woman was not going to give good advice, the man is her EX husband and he is still addicted.
Is it unreasonable to hope that my boyfereind might follow my requests to not joke and talk about it unless i am ready to talk about it? He is telling me i am being ridiculous to expect him not to say anything. I say he is not my father. If someone needs to look out for me and talk to me, my father is glad to do that. I don't know. Ive never been in this position and i don't know what is reasonable to expect from my boyfriend and what is not.
Can anyone please help me figure this out?
Thanks for reading all of this
LBrooke
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