skope (and IWC) - have you read this thread back again from the beginning? I have just done that and I can see that there is an amazing collection of questions for you (not him) to start your recovery. Have you given them any thought?
Your own "why"s will get you far in this situation. The "why"s for him, not so much. I understand, though, if you are not ready yet. That's OK - it sometimes takes more pain to say "enough". But maybe this thread will give you a glimpse into how your bf feels when you are on his back about getting "better". Just a thought.....