Hi and welcome to SR, i feel for you, cant ever have a guarantee, my fiance was an A, he cleaned up his act he had been an A for a long time, we then got married I have 2 girls, 7 years down the line he had been sober, then he slipped, so now, we are in the 3rd year of him secretly drinking. I told him to stop 2 years in, said he would, he never did, I found more bottles. I am devastated to say the least. I can only say one thing, what happens if your man has a bad time and the stressor comes back, it just takes one taste, and its back to day 1. Please think very carefully, go to the meetings, read up on here. If u are not married it is easier and less traumatic for your son, if one day u are married and then want to divorce? Addiction is hard on a co dependant & children, nothing you say or do will change how the addict feels.