I first met him when he was 10 years old. We went on with our lives and took different paths. My 1st husband was alcoholic and finally got sober and was sober 8 years before he relapsed and we split up. At this point the man I knew when he was 10 contacted me and said he was still in love with me and he'd been clean 3 years and would I come home and marry him? I went home. He was clean and sober 3 more years before his first relapse. And the next six years....went in and out of jail and in and out of programs. Long story short, if he was truly clean and sober for at least a year, I would give him another chance. I have seen many success stories in AA and have been in and out of Alanon since 1980. And I have seen relationships work when you both work a program. We have such a long history, I hear that voice and I remember the man I knew when he WAS clean and sober. I have seen people change. I have a few great friends in the program.