littlebird77

Hello, as some of you know, I've been trying to end it with my RABF for, oh five years hehe... He is still clean, but the lifestyle has not changed much. He is no longer engaging with the same people, he looks beautiful, and takes care of himself better... On the flip side, he sleeps all day and watches tv, plays guitar or video games all night... Still no job.

Here is my issue. His father is very ill and in and out of hospitals. So he has a legitimate problem. I say this because he is known to make mountains out of grains of sand with his problems.

The problem I have is that I am not getting any attention or emotional availability. I feel like he has shut me out. I tell him this, and he uses the situation with his dad as a defense. (He is extremely close to his dad, but I feel heartless, because I feel I deserve some attention.)

I guess because this relationship has an underlying element of addiction in the foundation, I can not distinguish a true relationship issue with an addiction issue... Do I make any sense? I feel that all relationships have problems, and what makes the relationship grow is how we handle the issues at hand appropriately and with sanity. But when and where is it when it falls into the addiction part. (him not giving me attention, no job, just as he was when he was active.)

Although I am trying to detach from this, I would love feedback for any future relationships I may have. I feel as though I'm branded by this tragedy of addiction.