The fourth day already,
I woke up 9:30 pm in a major panic attack. Didn't go to bed until 3:00 am and was totally hyper. Heard the roosters and didn't fall asleep until it was light which is saying something because it is getting on close to winter overhere.
Then I remembered that I had this huge cup of coffee at a friends place around 4:00 pm
What was I thinking?
(I'm usually a very moderate coffee drinker. 1-2 cups of weak latte early in the morning.)
Good news: No cravings and strongly motivated. Had a really wholesome day sharing my first home cured bacon with friends at their organic gardens (Tuesdays we always try to have a feast. Alcohol is never even considered). Told them I was on the wagon again and got smiles of delight and acceptance. Awesome.
Originally Posted by
traderjane 
I have to say that on Day 4 I feel really, really good. So good, in fact, that I recognize this as a trigger. It's such a cycle. I drink, feel like crap, decide to stop, stop for a few days, feel better each day to the point where I feel so good that I don't know what to do with myself, then decide to celebrate "feeling good" with a nice cold glass of white wine. The twisted reasoning is: I feel so good right now -- I bet I can feel EVEN BETTER with a nice glass of wine! Insanity, really.
So even though I feel good, I'm not going to "celebrate" it. That will just kill it. I'm going to keep going.
Oh, and I'm going to the grocery store soon and will buy fresh limes and lemons. They always make soft drinks taste so much better
Yep I do to!
In HALT moments (I always think that Angry stands for any intense emotions)
I need to walk away and just meditate or take a warm comforting bath or something otherwise the "I need to curb that" feeling takes over because it inevitably leads to major craving