Originally Posted by
skope 
cos then that leaves him to do as he pleases..
And that is his right as an adult, providing he is not breaking any laws. It may not be moral, in your eyes, but it is still his right to be a jerk. And it is your right as an adult to not have a relationship with that person if it means that it is doing you harm. You are not a victim in this. There comes a time when you are volunteering to be treated in this way.
I fear you are trying to fit a square peg into a round hole.