and I am not going to bite. This Saturday will be 2 full weeks sober. It has been OK. Not great, but we aren't fighting either.
Last night AH was watching The Office and it listed signs of cheating....he said I have all of the signs....phone is locked b/c it is a touch screen and the kids like to play with it, if he asks to see it, I always give it to him. He says I don't share my passwords, I can have privacy too. He says I am dieting- I am. After 4 kids, I finally want to get back to where I am happy with myself. Walking, exercising, tanning makes me feel great. After 13 years of him putting me down, I am enjoying myself. I am in a wedding next month and I was the biggest girl. Not anymore. I had much self discipline and worked my butt off to get to where I wanted to be. He says I have friends he doesn't know....they are not really my friends. They are my sister and her fiances friends...when I go out with my sister, I talk with these people. Then when H asks me who was out, I tell him. He said tanning and running to the store shouldn't take 30-40 minutes....I have no reason as why it did or if it didn't. I didn't pay attention...I didn't know I was timed. Ok, so then I go to bed and thought he was joking. I woke up today and noticed he was on 2 websites about how to know if She's cheating....so I said something about thinking it was a joke last night but now I am hurt. His response was that if you want you can find anything you want to support your reasoning online. He says I do it from SR. I asked for an example- he didn't have one. I said I may nod my head, but that is all. I don't tell him the things I read here. I guess I don't understand his motive behind this. I am really started to wonder if I did something else that would make him think anything. He says I owe him an apology. I don't know what for. I asked him, but I don't get a good reason. He just says I look for things online and pertain them to him and when I ask him like what he doesn't say anything.
I am driving myself crazy....I wonder if he is trying to start a fight b/c he wants an excuse to drink....which has been done MANY times. Ugh. I just don't know what to think.
