Occam - I really am feeling for you right now, and I'm really sorry to hear what alcohol has done to your family. It sounds like you're willing to start again, or you wouldn't be posting. I had to start out praying to be "willing to be willing" at first because I didn't really want to quit - I just wanted the pain to stop. I've had alot of attempts to quit drinking (hundreds if not thousands) and right now I'm only on Day 2. I've been putting off going to the doctor for a couple years, because I've been afraid to find out if alcohol has done damage to my health. For the past few years, I've probably spent at least 2 days a week in bed with a hangover. Lately, it's been more like 3 or 4. The hangovers are coming more frequently and lasting longer. I know what direction this is going in, and frankly, I don't think I'd be able to support myself by this time next year if I continue the way I'm going. I could probably play it out a little longer, teach myself an even bigger lesson, after all, I'm not dead YET. The ironic thing is that when I got sober 20 years ago, I was only drinking a 6-pack a day and I thought I had a real problem back then. We just keep stretching the boundaries, you know? The suffering WILL continue to get worse - it's not like we're going to find some brand new way of drinking without consequences.
Thank you for your post. I'm sending prayers your way.
