Welcome, dopeout. I feel the chaos in what you wrote and I pray she does make in into rehab (or already has). She knows she needs help and at least she went to her parents where the animals can be cared for while she does what she needs to do for herself.
You say you smoke pot (for the pain) and even though it is for pain, pot can still get you high and with you high and her on drugs, it sounds like a toxic relationship.
This might be a good time for each of you to stop trying to please/manipulate/control the other and just find some recovery with some space between you.
Since you are the one who posted here, I am going to suggest that you try some addiction counseling or NA meetings that may help you deal with your own issues with drugs. What you ultimately choose to do is up to you, but if you want healing of some kind, it would be a good beginning.
I'm glad you joined us and hope you'll take a read around and
perhaps learn from what has helped so many of us.
Hugs