Originally Posted by
avenell 
Thanks for the support everyone... the funny thing is, this guy isn't a jerk. He's done really nice, selfless things for me in the past. But he was drunk, and I'm ashamed to say it, but I've done some really mean things to people I love while under the influence.
I went to some court ordered AA classed about 7 years ago. Back then, I didn't think my drinking was a problem. I was just young and having a good time. In hindsight I see that getting arrested and being ordered by a judge to go to AA is a big problem. I'm ready to give it another try on my own terms, but I am scared and have a lot of anxiety about going to my first meeting alone. I just don't now what to expect, and that makes me nervous.
If anyone could answer some basics about what a meeting is like I would really appreciate it... Do I have to introduce myself if I don't want to at first? Are there people of all ages? What happens in a meeting? Do I need to have a sponser eventually and how do you get one? Also, I'm not religious at all and am apprehensive about all the God talk associated with AA... Any insight at all would be super helpful!
AA is a great choice. You won't be expected to say anything unless you want to. First someone will start off with their story of recovery and how they're coping and then the floor will be opened for anyone who wants to share their experiences or recent issues during recovery. Not too sure about a sponsor, I'm still quite new to AA but I'm sure someone else can answer.
Lastly, I'm an atheist. I'm currently in between step 2 and 3 and they were quite hard for me as I had to come to terms with a higher power. For me it's all the good karma in the world. Human compassion. The same compassion that people here show; that people in AA show, and that people in day to day life show. I was never getting sober on my own and that took a long time for me to accept. I needed help, which was hard for me as I'm very strong headed and always think I can conquer anything on my own. But...I can't. I think realising that was one of the greatest moments in my life.
Anyway your higher power will come to you, it can be anything you like.