I dont know dub, They say anything you put in front of your recovery you will lose eventually anyway.
I understand not being able to just not go to work for awhile to get help. Its like a catch 22 sometimes it seems.
But this isnt going to stop until you do something about it.
Have you tried a day treatment place? Intensive out patient. They have day and night groups. Its just like rehab except you go home and can go about your responsibilities.
How bout meetings?
Just doing nothing isnt going to do anything. I am glad you can come here and vent. But what is that going to do to fix the problem?
I hope you find a solution soon. I know you want to. At least i think you do. But you have to take action. Either that or just dont drink..no matter what.