Paulos, sometimes I don't feel like I am doing well at something fast enough. While it doesn't work with a powerful force every time, it does help me to look back at the little things, going inch by inch instead of mile by mile. I think I know what you mean by it feeling like there is a fake idea of living, as you go forward. I think that means there is a forgetfulness about how alcohol was a fake way of living. That comes into my mind sometimes when I am bored or feel like I am missing out on something. Then I remember I have to put INTO my life in order to feel like I can TAKE anything out of it. I don't know if that makes sense the way I wrote it. You should probably keep doing what you are doing, that is taking inventory of your habits and achievements. The little things add up over time because they are like a foundation (I think...I only have a few months of sobriety).