hi SoberNMe1
Welcome
I was a very different man in early recovery to the one I was when drinking...and I was different at 30 days than I was at 60 or 90....I don't think I really settled into who I was until 6 months or so.
I'm glad I didn't act impulsively in those early days.
It's probably best to give yourself time to work out what these feelings really are.
D