Foxy, try not to give in to all-or-nothing thinking. Imagine the possibility that she won't let you see the children, now. You have five days sobriety. I don't know what has gone on in the past, but she may need a longer period of sobriety before she trusts you. that doesn't mean you'll never see your kids again if she says no today. You have to keep workiing at it, regaining her trust day by day, staying sober one day at a time. It took longer than 5 days to get to this point. You can do it, always keep your goal in mind. You're doing great!