hi foxy
i've just read through your thread for the first time and have really enjoyed your first couple days of sobriety. it is the hardest thing that i've ever done and am doing again today.
you dont' need to 'believe in god' to attend meetings or even to stay sober. many people say you do and the "big book" says that also...but people have and do get sober without god, and the big book also talks about that and that it worked for some back in the day (the 30's)
the important thing is to have an open mind towards spiritual principals. such would be: Honesty, Openminded-ness, willingness. the acronym of H.O.W.
I'm proud of you. go ahead and try some meetings if you can muster up the courage. maybe try 3 or 7 or 90 meetings no matter what, before you begin to decide if it might be for you.
You can do this. You NEVER have to take another drink. One is too many and a thousand is not enough