M1sgt,
First of all thank you for serving our country, God bless you for that.
I'm a recovering opiate/cocaine addict. I began abusing pain pills after an accident more than ten years ago. Before rehab, I was swallowing 30, 10mg pills (hydro or oxycodone) each day along with snorting/smoking a LOT of cocaine. So, I was basically 'speedballing'. I od'd several times, and only by the grace of God, I'm alive today and 18 months clean.
Have you ever considered Suboxone. It has really helped me to get my life back. Your pill habit was as big as mine so you might want to consider it.
Just hang in there and keep posting. You'll get a lot of support and good advice here from those who've been exactly where you are right now.
It's not easy to get clean, but, it's so worth it. Do it for you....do it for your family.
Penny