I don't know if I really care anymore. The insomnia is just another reminder of what I really am. Which is the hard part I have to deal with now. I have been sober for a couple of days, but what is the point? If "detoxing Michael" is no different than " usual drunk Michael" why should I even try? *sigh* I just don't care. Let the beast run.
Yeah I used to feel like that Michael. I wasted 10 years feeling like that. The thing is, what I didn't know then was that I was a far better person than I was giving myself credit for.
I just needed to step out of the swamp and stand on some dry land a while to get some perspective.
You're trying to change your life - it's not easy and it's not quick - most days you have to run on faith that what you're doing is the right thing.
That's why I used SR a lot in the early days - my own judgement and perceptions constantly needed to be challenged and checked against sane peoples LOL...just for a while, until I found my dry land
Don't give up
D