intention

Hi Neo,

I heard someone share today that you should never go into your own head without a responsible adult, lol.

When you talk about the nostalgia, I am reminded of Bill's story when he talks about the exhilarating time he had at the start of his drinking and how he had arrived.

I know I found it very useful to read the whole story for both of my addictions seperately. For each addiction I could see the pattern from exhilarting, to necessary and so on down into despair. I know others have found this useful.

Writing down how you are feeling can be very helpful. Have you written a Step 4 inventory on this with all the columns as set out in the big book?....and then followed up with steps 5 to 9 where applicable? It's reading like you have some resentments here surrounding this drug issue.....and perhaps some fear that you may never be able to indulge.