Hi Kjell!!! If I told you that you sound "normal" to me would you believe that? Seriously, you sound like you're right where you're supposed to be.
It is very hard to get through this, it's still very early for you but it sounds like you're doing everything you can be doing to get yourself on the successful road of Recovery!!
I went through so many of the same things that you expressed up there in your post and what I can tell you is that IT WILL GET BETTER!!!! Hang in there!!
Just remember "one day at a time", "easy does it", "just for today" and all those lovely cliche's.
Keep posting, you know you will get tons of support as always from your SR family.
