Originally Posted by Whadahay

I didn't believe in "God" when I came into AA. I had no flipp'n idea what people were talking about. Spirituality?? What the?? I thought everyone was brainwashed about this whole "God" talk thing.

And then after hanging around the AA rooms for awhile, I realized that I actually did have my own personal higher power all along = but was too "egotistical" to think along those lines ... I remembered that after my LAST black-out weekend - of which I could have been at the bottom of a river (where I woke up next to), detox, jail, or hostage to a psychotic rapist (it was a predator who bought me drinks all night long).

Right after my black-out weekend, I DID think to myself … I won't be given any more chances. If I drink again, there will not be anything protecting me. No more chances to narrowly avoid danger - next time- next time, I will wake up from a black-out and find myself sitting in detox or in jail or hostage to a psycho sadist and be raped viciously – or something equally devestating.

When in actuality, my own personal higher power had been protecting me all along from some very dangerous situations. I survived a lot of abusive situations - but I am alive and well. If I had not listened to that thought, I would most likely be continuing the near-fatal alcoholic reckless lifestyle, and I would not be here writing this post.