thanks.
callie, that helped a lot. i have got to figure out what could possibly be next for me. i'm 56yrs old, totally grey headed and partially disabled. i just can't imagine any kind of life after this. i've spent most of my adult yrs hoping for change or that miracle to happen and now that he's gone, i feel kind of hopeless.
i know i'm not alone, i have my kids and you guys but now i think i know what real loneliness feels like, i only thought i knew before. i wish there was a pill i could take, even the voice of my addiction has tried to call me out but don't worry, i won't let that happen. that would be worse than anything.
i've been sitting here most all day, every day and half the night, i just feel like typing, doing whatever i can to keep busy. this is where i come when i can go no where else. i hope you guys understand. i'm not crazy or going crazy, it just feels like it sometimes.
if any one gets tired of reading this, please just pass on by, i do understand. sr is not all about me and my trials, i just don't know what else to do right now.