Welcome! You will find some truly great support here (Look at the amount of posts some of the members have. This is a group I have found to be a GREAT help.)
You did not know about it, so how can you even start to blame yourself?
I was told the three C's
you did not Cause it, you can not Control it, you can't Cure it
Your boyfriend needs to seek professional help. If he has no insurance, emergency medicaid normally kicks in for such, depending on income. (That is what I have seen, but it may vary from state to state.)
You need to take care of YOU, find meetings and continue to seek support for your own sanity.